THE LUNCHEON

Date: 2015-10-07; view: 580.

After W. Somerset Maugham

I saw her at the theatre the other day. I didn't recognize her at once. But someone mentioned her name and during the interval I went over and sat down beside her. She spoke

¹ to dress in their very best — одеться во все самое лучшее

² to take Mother fishing — взять маму на рыбную ловлю

³ to make up a sort of lunch — приготовить нечто вроде завтрака

⁴ in case we got hungry — на случай, если мы проголодаемся

⁵ it was such a pity — было так жаль

⁶ as to us — что касается нас

¹ to get the dinner — приготовить обед

² Mother doesn't like fishing — мама не любит рыбную ловлю

³ to catch cold — простудиться

⁴ we were not so lucky — нам повезло меньше
⁶ it was great fun — было очень весело

to me gaily: "Do you remember the first time I saw you? You invited me to luncheon." Did I remember?

It was twenty years ago, I lived in Paris. I had a small room in the Latin Quarter. I earned enough money to keep body and, soul together.¹

She wrote to me about one of my books. I answered and then received another letter from her. She wanted to come to Paris and have a talk with me. She asked me to give her a little luncheon at a restaurant. I was too young and I could not say "no" to a woman.

I had only eighty francs till the end of the month. "A small luncheon will not cost more than fifteen francs," I thought, "and if I don't take coffee for the next two weeks, I shall manage well enough."

So we met at the restaurant on Thursday at half past twelve.

She was not so young as I thought. In fact she was a wo­man of forty and not very pretty. She talked much, but as she wanted to talk about me I was ready to listen to her. When the waiter brought the menu, I saw that the prices were very high. But she said:

"I never eat anything for luncheon."

"Oh, don't say that!" I answered.

"I never eat more than one thing. I think people eat too much in our days. A little fish, perhaps. Have they any salm­on?"

They had, and I ordered it for my guest. The waiter asked her: "Will you have anything while we are cooking it?"

"No," she answered, "I never eat more than one thing. But if you have a little caviar—I shall take it. I like caviar."

My heart sank a little.² I knew I had not enough money to pay for caviar. But I could not tell her that. I told the waiter to bring caviar. For myself I ordered the cheapest thing on the menu and that was a cutlet.

"I don't advise you to eat meat. I don't know how you can work after this heavy food."

Then came the question of drink.

"I never drink anything for luncheon," she said.

"Neither do I,"³ I answered quickly.

¹ to keep body and soul together — едва сводить концы с кон-

цами

My heart sank a little. — У меня замерло сердце. ³ neither do I — и я тоже

"Except light wine," she went on. "These French wines are so light. They are wonderful."

"What will you drink?" I asked her.

"My doctor does not let me drink anything but cham­pagne." I think I became pale. I ordered half a bottle of champagne.

"What will you drink?" she asked.

"My doctor never lets me drink anything but water."

She ate the caviar and she ate the salmon. She talked gaily of art, literature and music. But I only wanted to know what the price of the luncheon was.

When the waiter brought my cutlet, she said, "I see that you always eat heavy things for luncheon. I am sure it's a mistake. Why don't you follow my example? You will feel much better for it."

"I shall eat only one thing," I said, as the waiter came again with the bill.

"No, no," she said. "I never eat anything for luncheon. Just a bite!¹ I never want more than that. I can't eat any­thing more, but if they have some of those giant asparagus I shall take them. I like them very much."

My heart sank again. I knew that they cost very much. But I ordered them. "Shall I be able to pay the bill?" I thought again and again. "What shall I do if the bill comes to more than I have." I did not want to take money from my guest. If the bill comes to more I shall leave my watch and say that I shall come back and pay later, I decided.

The waiter brought the asparagus. She ate them and I spoke of literature. At last she finished.

"Coffee?" I asked her.

"Yes, just an ice-cream and coffee," she answered.

It was just the same to me² now; so I ordered coffee for myself and an ice-cream and coffee for her.

"You know, I believe in one thing," she said as she ate the ice-cream, "after lunch I must feel that I can eat a little more."

"Are you still hungry?" I asked with horror.

"Oh, no, I am not hungry, you see, I usually don't eat luncheon. I have a cup of coffee in the morning and then dinner, but I never eat more than one thing for luncheon."

¹ Just a bite! — Только легкая закуска!

² it was just the same to me — мне было все равно

"Oh, I see"¹

Then a terrible thing happened. The waiter came up to us with a large basket full of peaches. They-were not in season then and their price was very high. My guest took one of those peaches.

"You see, you can't eat any more, but my luncheon is light and I shall eat a peach."

The bill came, and when I paid it I had the whole month before me and not a penny in my pocket.

"Follow my example," she said, "and never eat more than one thing for luncheon."

"I'lldo better than that," I answered. "I'll eat nothing for dinner tonight."

"Humorist!" she cried gaily. "You are quite a humorist!" And she jumped into a cab.

I am not a bad man. But I am glad that today she weighs more than three hundred pounds. So I had my revenge² at last.