Remove Divorce As An Option - Choose to Work Through the Conflict Between You Two

No one is saying that your marriage isn't difficult. It might even be miserable. But an interesting set of statistics shows that people who take divorce off the table as an option not only resolve their issues, but end up being happier than ever. If your marriage is feeling troubled, and you're considering divorce, consider trying alternate therapies instead, marriage counseling, or just some open communication. But whatever you do, don'tbring up the "D" word as an option, because doing that will change the rules of the game.

Now, of course it's important to acknowledge that there are a lot of influences on you to get a divorce. Your friends who don't like your spouse and popular culture. It's a common statistic that most marriages end in divorce, and so it seems like an acceptable, even normal way to resolve problems in a marriage.

But let's look at some statistics. Of all the couples surveyed who were contemplating divorce and then decided not to go through with it, 80% claimed to be happily married only five years later. In all likelihood this is due to two elements. The first is that those couples who decide not to consider divorce had no choice but to deal with the conflict between themselves head on. This is a powerful and proactive tactic that will lead to acknowledgment of the problems the couples face, and maybe even to solutions.

The other element is that once divorce is considered, the dynamic of the relationship is changed. This is a more subtle, though far more destructive product of considering divorce. The dynamic of this is simple. When a fundamental disagreement develops in a marriage - as it will in almost all relationships - those who never consider divorce are forced to deal with the disagreement. Those who do consider divorce preserve an"out" that can be used without ever addressing the issue. As the problems in the marriage mount the easy out of divorce can become more and moreappealing.

This thinking will take both of you, however. When both people in a marriage are actively searching for a solution to a problem, and both accept that divorce is not - and will not be - an option, a solution will almost surely be found. You and your spouse will be asking what you can do to make your marriage better, rather than asking if it's worth it, or if you should cut your losses and run. This is one of the Secrets of Marriage.

I. Find the equivalents in the text:

Разрушительный; брак; напряжение; пора; развод; тревога; разобщенность; недоверие; злость; супруг; испортить; спасение; устранить; возможный выбор; преодолеть; несчастливый; снять вопрос с обсуждения; дать трещину; альтернативные средства; консультации по вопросам брака; откровенный разговор; рассматривать в качестве варианта решения проблемы; обдумывать; по всей вероятности; благодаря; лицом к лицу; дальновидная тактика; сталкиваться; думать о разводе как о выходе из положения; попытаться решить проблему; расти; привлекательный; стоит ли он того; списывать убытки со счета.

Learn these words and word combinations by heart.

II. Answer the questions:

If a marriage is heading towards divorce, what feelings do spouses experience? What is the best way to rescue a marriage?

What influences spouses to get a divorce?

What did 80% of couples that decided not to go through with divorce claim five years later?

What are the two elements which saved the marriage of the couples that decided not to go through with divorce?

What is your point of view on the problem?

III. Make a dialogue between the spouses discussing the rescuing of their marriage.

6)

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